


They rarely ever see it coming

by HikariYumi



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Burn Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Morgana is a good bro, Phantom Thieves family, Rehabilitation, Stress, support network
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-17 23:30:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18108731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HikariYumi/pseuds/HikariYumi
Summary: Akira Kurusu is a busy teenager. Between keeping his head down in school, studying, being a Phantom Thief and a good friend his free time is spread pretty thin. It might not help that he himself is the biggest stressor and asking others for help a mysterium. Morgana has a front row seat to see his friend navigate towards the inevitable crash.





	They rarely ever see it coming

**Author's Note:**

> Hello...
> 
> so I planned to write a sweet sick Akira fic.. but when I looked up stress induced sickness (let's be honest, what Akira does in the game is not short of impressing) and stumble naturally over burn-out. Way too intrigued i tried to put it into a fanfic.. and I'm not quite sure if I succeeded in making it believable. 
> 
> As someone who loves seeing people get hurt - so that they can become better afterwars - i wrote it anyways...
> 
> I'm sorry for mispresentations and writing errors.. I did my best...
> 
> This is by no means a polished work and I’m far away from happy with it. It’s stilted and weird but at this point I’ll just put it out here and take it as a learning experience. Consider yourself warned ;)
> 
> ~Hikari

Morgana wasn’t one of the most perceptive people outside of the metaverse. It had taken him a while to grow accustomed to the underlying emotion between the Phantom Thieves and integrate himself into them. That, of course, didn’t mean that he wasn’t a human, just that his social radar wasn’t quite as extensive as it could be. Well, it wasn’t as if Ryuji wasn’t much better in that regard, sometimes he was flailing around like an axe in a forest.

But just as the brash boy had a surprisingly gentle and sympathetic side, Morgana too wasn’t blind to other people’s needs. Just occasionally a bit far-sighted.  
Anyway, it wasn’t too far-fetched that Morgana was also the first to recognize the signs that Akira was not his usual self. After all he got carried around in the boy’s bag the whole day and even the Phantom Thieves’ Leader sometimes forget to keep himself in check in front of his cat-shaped companion. 

It began innocent enough, the kids had succeeded over that jerk Kamoshida and had decided to keep going as the mismatched group they were, something Morgana greatly encouraged, after all. Despite the deadline being met, Akira started to look more tired. There wasn’t really anything pressing to do at the time, except for the upcoming exams, so the cat decided it would pass.  
But it didn’t. 

Morgana had made it his job to look after the Leader as much as he could. It was justified, how should he teach Akira infiltration and strategy if the boy wasn’t properly taking care of himself. So, he stopped Akira from going out at unreasonable times in the evening or after particularly exhausting days, pressuring him into going to bed more than once. It took him an uncomfortable long while to realize that despite those efforts the kid kept staring into space a lot of the nights instead of getting that much needed rest.  
After Morgana confronted him about that, Akira always closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep, but the other Thief wasn’t fooled by that. He wasn’t an idiot after all.

Naturally, Morgana thought about telling Ryuji or Ann about the more worrying habits of their friend to get some help from them, but as long as there were still nights where Akira would drop dead on the spot and not wake up until his alarm went off, it couldn’t be so bad, right?  
Well, and if those nights felt uncanny to Morgana it must be him being paranoid.

~

Yusuke was a human dumpster fire when it came to care of himself. He didn’t even seem to notice that, really, it was as hilarious as unsettling how much that boy lived for his art. Akira was the one who started the trend of bringing some more snacks to feed the Phantom Thieves’ new addition, eventually even offering his own share because he claimed to not feel hungry.  
Ryuji asked if he was dieting to combat the effects of all the food they consumed in the metaverse for healing purposes. Akira didn’t actually answer, just did his thing where he was rubbing his neck sheepishly and they all had learned to accept that instead of words. 

Time went by and Morgana was hauled along to an ever-increasing number of all kinds of events. The cat watched their leader applying for a stunning number of three part-time jobs while making acquaintances all over Tokyo. They even got to the point where Morgana skipped out of a few meetings to nap somewhere because the stress was starting to make him irritated and he wasn’t even the one to do the actual work.  
But despite that, Akira himself seemed to be handling things alright. Sure, he was a bit tenser and sometimes he slipped up after a long day in Mementos, but with Queen in their ranks that wasn’t much of a problem. 

~

Neither Akira nor Joker were talkative people. Akira was soft spoken and more of an observer while Joker was always busy thinking and planning to keep the group running smoothly, so his words were precise and short. It didn’t bother the rest, all of them had their quirks so they were quick to accept each other.  
And if the talks Morgana and Akira had used to share in the beginning started to become sparser, then it was just a sign of the always rotating boy trying to juggle way too many things at once.

When Morgana caught wind of Akira applying for a job at Crossroads the cat finally put his foot down, enough was enough.

“Nope, not happening. Three jobs were stupid but another one is insanity. We’re going to Mementos at least once a week and both of us know you can’t take a shift afterwards, you don’t have enough time for all of that. Seriously, I get that you want to gather intel and become closer to that reporter while you’re at it, but you can quit something else in the meantime. We’ve long followed Mishima’s leads on the cat abuser and the man who assaults people in the mall, you don’t need money that much to keep going there, as well.”

That was true, Akira had managed to gather quite some savings over the last months, something that wasn’t surprising considering his perfectionistic work ethic and the regular trips to Mementos with its many treasures. And even if medicine and supplies were expensive, Morgana was certain that the other Thieves would be just as happy to step up their game and contribute. Except Yusuke, maybe, they shouldn’t take any risks with him. He was too close to being even more careless than their Leader himself.

“Besides that, you’re meeting Tora for his speeches now anyway, so you don’t need to catch him at the Beef Bowl shop anymore. That job is hell anyway, I’m surprised you haven’t given it up already. Really, you’re an odd person, Joker.”

“You’re right.”  
Two words and shockingly, no real argument; Akira gave notice to his first three part-time jobs the very next day and never mentioned them again. Despite the more manageable schedule it didn’t seem to relieve the boy at all. Quite the opposite, the next school exams appeared on the horizon and the former top student dropped like a stone in the sea. In one of her visits Kawakami-sensei even told Akira to get a grip, that the written exams might decide the majority of his grade, but the lack of attention in class was turning the other teachers against him. All of them knew that it wasn’t something Akira could allow to happen, not if those people could find a reason to expel him and completely ruin his life in the process.

Morgana felt for his friend, he really didn’t deserve all the pressure and mistrust that was directed at him. Whenever the cat thief watched Akira dutifully filling out the report on his numerous daily activities, he swallowed hard. 

Maybe turning back into a human wasn’t the most pleasant idea. It seemed so strenuous.

~

In defiance of all the group studying the Phantom Thieves had done together, as well as the one-on-one tutoring from Makoto, Akira would’ve failed horrendously if it hadn’t been for Morgana. The cat had no idea why, but his friend just stared blankly at his sheet, eyes blinking in and out of focus, unseeing. When half of the exam time was over and Akira still hadn’t done as much as put his name on the paper, Morgana decided to do something.

In that moment he desperately wished he wouldn’t have napped as much during class as he did. But when the bell rang as a sign that the first day of exams was Morgana was confident that they had at least a decent chance to pass. The whole ordeal had been a group effort, while Morgana tried to recall as many answers as possible, Ann and even Mishima coughed and obscured as many meowing sounds as possible. It was a miracle they hadn’t gotten caught.

A part of Morgana hoped that Akira would catch himself in time for the next days but he was disappointed. When confronting his friend in he evening about it, Akira just slumped down on his bed, head burrowed in his hands.  
Against his intentions, the cat thief didn’t pry further after hearing the boy’s quiet admission that he didn’t know what was going on.

~ 

The repercussions of the blackout seemed to really hit home for Akira. Sojiro didn’t scold him for only barely passing, but instead only gave a tired shake of his head. That seemed to do quite a decent job of its own, since Akira spent the following night curled into himself facing away from Morgana and trying to calm his erratic breath. 

Kaneshiro was dealt with, but the Phantom Thieves started into their summer holidays with a new threat looming over their heads. It really appeared as if they just couldn’t catch a break. Akira grew irritated, more at himself than at the others and his usual encouraging demeanor was replaced by a more pessimistic approach.

At this point Makoto and then Ryuji tried to talk to Akira, but the other boy had clearly closed himself off from them outside of battle. That went so far that he let most of the leading to Queen or Mona. In a funny twist of fate Akira mirrored their next target, Sojiro’s shut-in daughter Futaba, but didn’t seem to realise.

The Thieves managed to close the chapter of Futaba’s palace without much input from Joker. The following days were spent with only the vague Medjed threat and the anticipation of Futaba’s awakening to darken the mood. Akira declined inquiries for training in Mementos and excused himself as being busy with confidant meetings. That of course wasn’t a lie, there rarely ever was a time when the boy didn’t have anyone to tend to, but nowadays the fulfillment he had once displayed had vanished.

Sometimes Morgana felt as if he was merely living with a shadow of their friend, who was only running through Akira’s motions. It was scary and unsettling for a bunch of different reasons.

~

During the first week of August Akira fell sick. He was doing a great job downplaying his headache and dizziness until he fainted while helping Sojiro out in the café. Out of all places where it could’ve happened, Morgana supposed he got quite lucky. Not only had the cat-shaped thief much needed help to get Akira upstairs, but Takemi-sensei’s clinic was nearby.

Sojiro had to sit down on the attics sofa when the doctor explained that the boy hadn’t just caught a bad flu but was suffering from something else entirely. 

When Akira came to his senses again he answered Takemi’s questions obediently, either too worn down or not dumb enough to mince his words.

 

Stomach pain and appetite loss for a few weeks, bone-deep tiredness even longer. Akira hadn’t gotten a good night’s rest in months, but at least the chest pain and heart palpitations were comparingly new additions.

 

Morgana felt frozen in place as he listened to Takemi’s own observations and cautious diagnosis. At this point she had already knocked Akira out again, either to spare him from talking things out right then or to prevent his body from giving out by itself again, the cat thief wasn’t sure. The doctor talked to Sojiro for a long time and Morgana wondered how bad Akira would feel about worrying the man even more on top of the whole Futaba issue. Knowing the boy, he would feel extremely guilty. Hiding his own problems to not take attention away from “more important” matters, yes, that sounded a lot like Akira.  
Damn you Joker.

After quite a bit of nudging and irritating attempts at communication Sojiro called the Thieves over to LeBlanc to fill them in. 

And after stifling trepidation had settled upon them, Sojiro gave the teenagers some space in one of the booths while excusing himself with some kind of weak reasoning. Akira was still asleep in his bed and knowing the cause no one was eager to disrupt his rest.

“Why didn’t we notice? We’re his friends, we HAD to realize something was wrong. I mean, he was helping me out the whole time and we saw each other every damn day. I’m such an idiot.”  
All of the joking antipathy aside, Morgana really valued Ryuji as a good friend. He wasn’t surprised that he was the first to critique himself, to beat himself up.

 

“I’m living with him and I haven’t been able to put two and two together. I mean we all knew something was off recently, but Akira is such an idiot when it comes to take something for himself. Damn it.”

 

“Looking back to all the afternoons Akira accompanied me to Mementos to guard me while I was drawing, or encouraged my process; I feel troubled knowing that he could have profited from some help as well.”

 

Yusuke’s eyes were downcast, but he wasn’t the only one. Ann’s hands were clenched around her cup of coffee, tight enough that Morgana worried about its integrity; Makoto bit her lip, undoubtly thinking about all the times Akira had been her pretend-boyfriend so that she could help Eiko out.  
Ryuji though wasn’t screaming like the cat thief had anticipated it, but his unusual silence proved just as glaring. They could feel his temper radiating through the air despite the calm mask the boy had donned, like a volcano brooding before it erupted.

 

“What did the doctor say, what can we do?” It was no question for them that there was something they could do. Ryuji was just as ready as the others to do everything possible to help their friend out. Not only as fair payback, but because they were family.  
Akira had assisted their rebellion to take shape, so it was just right for them to reignite his burned-out heart. 

~

Akira was still exhausted, even after days of sleep. Takemi had explained to him - and suspiciously enough, Morgana - that it was another symptom that would vanish with time and the right care. The doctor left that day with the clear instruction for Akira to write a list of his stressors as well as a way to reduce them. She had joked that he got lucky that he was on break anyway, so he could take his time to settle into a new, better routine.

For seven days the Phantom Thieves made sure that their Leader stayed at home, not isolated but decelerated from his usual responsibilities. Sojiro kept an eye on him during the days, sitting his charge down in one of the booths to chat with him whenever there were no customers to attend. Sometimes Morgana would roll up on Akira’s lap or obediently sit in his bag next to him, sometimes one of the others picked him up in the mornings to take him with them on their errands.  
It worked quite splendidly, Ann and Makoto had contacted all the confidants and explained that Akira was sick for the time being and that if they needed help they were happy to assist for the time being. Morgana and the boy brainstormed who of the group would be most suited to replace him with each confidant and there hadn’t been complains from any side yet. Well, except for inquiries why Akira thought it was a good idea to handle so many things on his own of course.

Despite the Thieves taking over the brunt of the work, it didn’t mean that their Leader stopped meeting the people he became close to. Over the following days some confidants dropped by LeBlanc for a chat, Ohya for example after a night of drinking under the pretense to “sober up” and Hifumi to hide from people who found out about her hiding spot in the church.  
Even Kawakami swung by, using her now freed up schedule to not only relax with a cup of coffee, but to apologize as well. She came bearing gifts in form of a new deal: in exchange for making Curry for her she would help him study to catch the free fall that were Akira’s current grades. Kawakami understood better than a lot of the others what it meant to break under constant pressure and was adamant to make amends for not realizing earlier.

~

Akira got better, now that everyone was keeping an eye on him he stopped skipping meals and was eating regularly now, small portions but it was better than nothing. It helped that Yusuke and Kawakami made him cook for them and afterwards eating together with him and that Ann and later Futaba always seemed to be hungry. Not eating alone was the key to reinforce the routine.

Futaba’s awakening was a blessing in more than one way, actually. Not only did she get rid of the Medjed threat and well, her shut-in life, but she as well was relearning her place in society. After declaring Akira her “key item” at the end of summer break, they tackled their respective isolation head on and covered for each other when they got overwhelmed.  
Through those missions Morgana learned that anxiety came in different forms and where Futaba tended to get panic attacks at the beginning, Akira got restless and withdrawn at the same time. One night he told Morgana that it was like an itch under his skin, people talking and making demands was stressing him that he felt the urge to get out of his body, somehow.

Generally, talking was another big point of Akira’s recovery. He might never be the most outspoken person in the world, but he was gradually relearning to trust his friends with worries and problems and eventually got it stuck in his big head that he didn’t have to shoulder everything on his own. After all, he was the one who kept telling people that needing help was okay and a human thing, it would be stupid to deny himself that very thing, right?

~

Morgana wasn’t able to accompany them to Hawaii, but the disappointment was overshadowed by Akira finally smiling openly again. The mini holiday had been something he had desperately needed and it turned out that it had been the very first in his life as well.

Sojiro had looked a bit stunned when Ann remarked it after their return, a look Morgana had come to realise was usually connected to the man feeling sorry for someone.

~

If someone would’ve asked the group, and people did, Makoto’s sister and even Akechi, if this was the hardest time for the Phantom Thieves, they would disagree. By any means, it had pitted them together against just another enemy, a procedure that ever only had made them stronger. Sometimes this enemy just happened to be yourself and sometimes stealing a heart just wasn’t enough.  
But in the end, they always came out victorious because their team was ready to catch everyone who fell without doubt or hesitation. If Morgana had the ability to change anything of the year of the Phantom Thieves, he most likely wouldn’t. Sure, there was a lot of pain he could save everyone from, but he didn’t need to, no one regretted anything.  
The year had strengthened them, shaped them into the people they were and they were proud of themselves. 

And with the end of probation Akira not only had fought himself back to the top, but was finally able to look into the mirror again without the fake glasses he used to wear.


End file.
